


He's a Life Ruiner (he ruins lives)

by himalayanblue



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Attempt at Humor, Crack, I Don't Even Know, M/M, Swearing, dreamies meangirls!au, norenmin as the plastics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-17
Updated: 2018-08-17
Packaged: 2019-06-28 16:55:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,490
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15711405
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/himalayanblue/pseuds/himalayanblue
Summary: “Wait.. If he’s from Canada, why is he Korean?”“Oh my God, Jeno! You can’t just ask people why they’re Korean.” Renjun looks over to him with a face of exasperation.





	He's a Life Ruiner (he ruins lives)

**Author's Note:**

> the dreamies mean girls au no one asked for.
> 
> yes, i am aware that it is 2018.
> 
> yes, i am aware that i am only capable of writing crack.
> 
> yes, i am a mess and my writing is a mess.

It’s Mark’s first day of NCT Academy and he’s already regretting all his life decisions. 

 

“So, we have a new student with us. He just moved here from Canada!” Principal Lee introduces.

 

“Wait.. If he’s from Canada, why is he Korean?” Jeno asks.

 

“Oh my God, Jeno! You can’t just ask people why they’re Korean.” Renjun looks over to him with a face of exasperation.

 

In the corner of the room, Lucas yells, “Thou shall not useth God’s name in vain!”

 

“Shut up, Lucas! You’re not even religious.” Renjun snaps back.

 

_This is going to be a long year_ , Mark thinks bitterly to himself.

 

 

 

 

The bell rings signaling that it’s time for lunch. Mark makes his way to the cafeteria until he feels a hard pull on his arms.

 

“Hey! You’re the new kid, right?” Jisung and Chenle tug Mark by each arm to the side of the hallway roughly. Mark slowly nods. “What’s your name again?”

 

“My Korean name is Minhyung, but you can call me Mark.”

 

“Reolly? I’m gonna call you Minhyung.” Jisung replies without missing a beat. “We’re gonna be your new best friends so listen carefully. So you’re like a regulation hottie-”

 

Mark cuts him off, “Am I supposed to know what that means?”

 

“Own it,” Chenle whispers into his left ear. An unpleasant shiver racks Mark’s body.

 

“We need you to-” Chenle clears his throat lightly. “Fine! I need you to infiltrate the Dreamies. You’re like attractive or whatever so it shouldn’t be hard.”

 

Mark hopes he looks as confused he feels because _the fuck?_ “What’s the Dreamies?”

 

Chenle has stars in his eyes when he explains, “They’re basically the kings of NCT Academy. The best part is like they’re all together. And I mean together together. The only reason Jisung doesn’t like them is because Jaemin said he couldn’t joi-”

 

“OKAY CHENLE, THAT’S ENOUGH!” Jisung screams. “So you in or not?”

 

Mark really really hates his inability to say no.

 

 

 

 

So Mark guesses being with the Dreamies isn’t _that_ bad. Jaemin is… nice. In that fake, surprise bitch I just might stab you in the back type of way. But nonetheless, still nice. 

 

“Oh em gee! Your bracelet is so cute! Where’d you get it?” Jaemin asks Mark with that blinding smile of his at lunch one day.

 

“Umm thanks. I made it,” Mark replies awkwardly.

 

“Wow diy! Love it.” Jaemin says enthusiastically and then turns to whisper in Renjun and Jeno’s ear, “That is the ugliest effing bracelet I’ve ever seen in my life.”

 

“I’m still here.” 

 

Jaemin just continues smiling that smile that makes Jisung quote and quote, “wanna be hetero”.

 

“There’s a thirty percent chance that it’s already raining!” Jeno yells out suddenly.  “My mind… it’s so powerful.”

 

 

 

 

“So, have you seen anyone you think is cute yet?” Renjun asks after school.

 

Mark thinks of sparkly eyes and honey-like skin. “Yeah, there’s this guy from my Korean lit class. He’s kind of snarky but still cute, his name is Lee Donghyuck.”

 

Jeno and Renjun look at each other with wide eyes. Renjun begins intensely shaking his head, “Oh no. Like no. Yeah no. You can’t like Lee Donghyuck. He’s Jaemin’s ex. And exes are like off limits.”

 

“But aren’t the three of you dating now?” Mark questions.

 

“Donghyuck dumped him though and totally broke my Jaem Jams heart. You shouldn’t like someone like that anyway. Totally not fetch,” Renjun replies hastily.

 

Jeno has a look of confusion written all over his face and asks, “Didn’t Jaemin leave Donghyuck for us though?”

 

“Shut it, babe.” Renjun hisses through his teeth.

 

 

 

 

“See me at my desk,” Mark’s Korean Lit teacher says handing back a paper filled with red marks. “I think I can help you with that.”

 

At the end of class, Mark deliberately packs his bag up slowly in apprehension of approaching Mr. Moon.

 

“Umm.. you wanted to see me?”

 

Mr. Moon looks up from his papers and grins. “I see you’re struggling adjusting to the language so I thought you could use a tutor.” He waves his hand a little, pointing behind Mark and introduces, “this is Donghyuck, he’s the top student in our class and agreed to help you out a bit.”

 

Mark turns behind him and slightly averts his gaze down to make eye contact with Donghyuck. He gives Mark a small smile then turns his attention back to Mr. Moon.

 

_Oh fuck._

 

 

 

 

 

Jisung tells Mark it’s time to commence ‘Let’s Push the Dreamies in Front of a Bus but I’m too Cute to be Put in Jail so Let’s Just Make Jaemin Ugly before Spring Fling’ now that he’s earn their trust. Mark thinks there’s got to be a better name but he has other things to worry about.

 

“You know, son. I thought you would be a lot more hesitant to go along with the plan,” Jisung discloses suspiciously. 

 

“Okay, first, you’re like seven. Second, they mayhaps be in my way of Lee Donghyuck,” Mark says the last part shyly. He feels heat rise to his cheeks but ducks his head before Chenle and Jisung can make fun of him.

 

Chenle’s mouth drops open and his brows furrow. “Oh no, no, no! You can’t like Donghyuck. He’s Jaemin’s ex. And exes are like off limits.”

 

Mark gets deja vu. “So I’ve been told.”

  
“So you’ve been told and you’re still interested!? That’s like against the rules of feminism or something.”

 

“Lele… you’re a boy,” Mark says with a brow raised.

 

“THIS IS HOMOPHOBIA,” Chenle shouts in that voice that gets dolphins shaken.

 

 

 

 

“Hey, Jaemin! I got you something for your skin,” Mark announces, when he spots him at the back of the classroom.

 

“Bless! I’m trying to get my skin flawless before Spring Fling.” Jaemin shouts and throws down the fork from his salad because apparently he’s trying to lose three pounds. He turns the small container around in his hands to look for the label of the ingredients. “What’s in it? It’s all in English or something.”

 

“Ummm… it’s called syrupé. Yeah, it’s from Canada,” Mark explains quickly. If there’s anything he’s good at, it’s pulling bullshit out his ass.

 

Jaemin looks skeptical and proceeds to raise a well-plucked brow. “That sounds a lot like syrup? Isn’t that like that thing produced by meese?” 

 

“You mean moose?”

 

“Oh silly Marky! It’s plural!” Jaemin explains like it’s the most obvious thing in the world.

 

“… okay,” Mark says dully. “Anyway! My mom uses it and it makes her skin flawless.”

 

Jaemin eyes brighten up. “Awww thanks hoe. XOXO.”

 

“I also wanted to let you know, Donghyuck is tutoring me,” Mark slips in casually.

 

“ _WHAT?_ ”

 

 

 

 

“Did you dye your hair? It looks so good.” Jaemin says while twirling small strands of Donghyuck’s hair with his finger. Donghyuck glances at Renjun and Jeno who are sitting on either side of Jaemin, their eyes shooting daggers at him. Donghyuck would much rather swallow rocks than be having this conversation with Jaemin in the cafeteria right now but he still manages to act civil.

 

“Uhh it’s actually a wig. I just wanted to see how a different color would look without committing to it,” Donghyuck explains carefully.

 

“It feels so soft through my fingertips,” Jaemin throws on a flirty smile and give him a wink. “What’s it made of?”

 

Donghyuck’s had it. “Your mom’s chest hair!”

 

Mark snorts.

 

 

 

“I know you like me,” Donghyuck mentions during one of their tutoring sessions.

 

Mark splutters unintelligently. “Umm, what? How?”

 

“Chenle told me,” he replies with a shrug.

 

_Fucking traitor-_

 

“Also, I figured Jaemin flirting with me was probably out of pettiness,” Donghyuck continues. “Besides, he has Renjun and Jeno now anyway.”

 

“He’s a life ruiner. He ruins people’s lives.” Mark nods absent-mindedly. “So what now?”

 

“Maybe you should ask me to Spring Fling then maybe to be your boyfriend?” Donghyuck looks up expectantly. And who is Mark to deny such a request.

 

 

 

 

Jaemin gets Spring Fling Queen and Renjun and Jeno split a crown in half to share as Spring Fling Kings. (It was Jeno's idea, genius.) Jisung's plan of ‘Let’s Push the Dreamies in Front of a Bus but I’m too Cute to be Put in Jail so Let’s Just Make Jaemin Ugly before Spring Fling’ isn't a total flop because the syrup managed to give Jaemin a few bumps on his face. 

 

Chenle thinks Jaemin still looks fabulous.

 

Mark thinks they still need a better name for that plan.

 

But then he feels warm arms wrap around his neck and pull him towards the dance floor. Donghyuck looks beautiful with sparkly eyeshadow applied over his eyelids and pink lipgloss covering his lips. 

 

They sway slowly to the music in the background and Mark can't help but lean down and capture Donghyuck's mouth with his. Donghyuck tastes like strawberries from a vast field, and his kisses feels like sunshine on a chilly day.

 

Mark thinks this school year wasn't that bad after all. 

**Author's Note:**

> i'm actually just so weak for jaemina george, gretchjun wieners, and jenren smith.
> 
> i watched a few nct mean girls parody on youtube and this mess was born.
> 
> thanks for reading and feel free to leave some comments <3


End file.
